Married for 10 years with 2 kids, decent income. We made a budget to pay off debt, but my wife constantly overspends on wants like clothes, vacations. I want a 2nd home, pay kids’ college, retire well. How do I get her to commit to the plan?
She needs motivation to change spending habits. Try:
A. Positive money talks (Ramit Sethi).
B. Understand why she spends.
C. Use zero-based budgeting.
D. Separate savings, cancel credit cards.
E. Counseling.
F. Separation.
Seriously, you sound like all the couples interviewed on Seth’s “I will teach you to be rich” podcast. Recommend you watch several of them together.
@soundmind He said they combined incomes. She clearly earns her own money. He can cancel all of his own credit cards, but he doesn’t have the right to limit her from spending her own money on her own children.
@JANO10 If either one of a couple cannot control spending, it will ruin them both.
They do not have a plan. He has a plan and she is ignoring it.
If they have shared money, they need a shared plan that they both follow.
@soundmind Love this answer.
Be patient it takes time. Review the budget every month or quarter and ask Her how she thinks we can do better. Don’t tell her what she is doing wrong. People need to come to their own conclusions on how to do better. Has to be both your goals. Look for incremental improvements. discuss the end goal. We can take longer/better vacations. Afford the next car. kids in a better school. Retire. Ext.
@JANTY I just feel frustrated. Talking about money with my spouse is almost a taboo.
Everything i want to talk about the budget it stresses me.
Yesterday she got really mad because I inquired on why she made a charge to our cc instead of our daily spender account… then it was chaos because I was always checking her spending. Keep in mind… we each have our own individual account and we can spend whatever was alloted to it.
Review spending monthly, using Quicken. Make it conversational, like “Do the kids have enough clothes until Christmas?” Celebrate successes like “no-spend” days. Pay off charges from the spend account directly.
Thanks I eliminated using credit cards to make it easier. The overspending is just because in the same account we have groceries, gas, eating out, and kids stuff. I might need to segregate these even more lol