So, I’ve been trying to budget with my wife for a while now. She’s definitely getting better, but we’re still not quite there. I’m the more frugal one between us, and we’ve been using the Quicken Simplifi app for the last 6 months to track our spending. The thing is, she still goes over budget every month by at least $150-250. She always talks about saving for a house, but it’s hard to take that seriously when she’s constantly going over. Here’s what we do…
We have a joint checking account where both our paychecks go in
All bills and monthly expenses get split evenly
We each get $600/month for fun money (which is where she always goes over)
It’s frustrating having to call it out all the time and nothing really changes. I’m considering having her open her own checking account with her $600/month and use one of our hotel credit cards for all her purchases. At the end of each month, she’d be responsible for paying off the card. If there’s still a balance over $600, she’d have to figure that out. The card is under her name, so I don’t want to mess up her credit, but I’m stuck.
How do others handle finances with their significant others? Any advice or suggestions? Appreciate any input!
TIA!
I can relate. My partner and I have similar issues, especially with the ‘fun money.’ We’ve set a limit for certain categories like eating out or shopping, but it’s hard to stick to. Maybe have a discussion about why it’s important to stick to the budget? I’ve found that regular check-ins help too.
@Case
Yeah, we tried regular check-ins too, but sometimes it feels like we just go in circles. It’s tough to find the balance between being strict and still having fun with money.
Lake said: @Case
Yeah, we tried regular check-ins too, but sometimes it feels like we just go in circles. It’s tough to find the balance between being strict and still having fun with money.
Totally get it. It’s like, you don’t want to come off as the ‘bad guy’ all the time. Maybe creating a shared goal, like saving for a vacation, might make it feel less like a restriction and more like a shared purpose?
I get why you’d be frustrated, but I think the separate checking account idea could help. It might make her more conscious of the money she’s spending if she knows it’s her responsibility to pay off the card. I think it could work if you guys communicate about it first.
@Planner
Yeah, I think that might be the next step. Just worried about her credit getting messed up. Do you think it’d be an issue if we set it up like that?
Keir said: @Planner
Yeah, I think that might be the next step. Just worried about her credit getting messed up. Do you think it’d be an issue if we set it up like that?
As long as she makes sure to pay it off in full every month, it should be fine. Maybe set up reminders so she doesn’t forget?
Honestly, it sounds like you’ve been really patient. Maybe it’s time for her to see the actual consequences of going over budget. If you both agree on the rules beforehand, it might help her take it more seriously. It’s about finding a balance, right?
@Frost
Exactly. I don’t want to seem controlling, but I need her to understand the importance of sticking to it, especially with such a big goal like buying a house.
Just throwing this out there, but maybe she needs more motivation? Could you both try setting a bigger goal, like a home deposit? Something to remind her that it’s not just about small purchases, but the long-term goal?
We had similar issues with budgeting until we decided to work together on a shared money vision. Maybe talk about how both of you can reach your goals as a team? That’s what helped us stay more motivated.